Possible Carrer Path #1: Street Urchin

The only position more recession-proof than a pickpocket?

a LOVABLE pickpocket.

with the proper training, a DeLorean, and cosmetic surgery to make me look like a wistful young British boy, i could soon be making my living on the bustling streets of 19th century Londontown, nickin' the purses of any posh fatcats what passes me by. and, presumably, eating a lot of soup.

i've never read Oliver Twist, but if i've learned anything from the Billy Joel song from the disney movie based on the book based on horrible real-world circumstances, it's "Why should I worry?"